Aaltoe’s Blog

What started as an effort to capture a particular state of mind labeled “muddleheadedness” has turned toward trying to understand the state of mind I find myself in these days. I suppose one can be muddleheaded as a result of overstimulation, or an onslaught of competing stimuli, or a plethora of options for something that was thought to be straightforward; but it is not this kind of state that I am attempting to explicate. Instead it is my state of mind that results from the particular situation I find myself in. Muddleheadedness is not the right comprehensive label for that condition, although there are moments when it does seem to describe the state of mind quite well. My effort, though, is to get at deeper levels of thought and feeling that accompany the situation I find myself in.

First it will be helpful to describe some of the aspects of this “situation.” I have been “sheltered down“ in my house here in Cambridge for more than one month rarely venturing off the property. The city and the state have imposed restrictions on what to do in public places like keeping a distance from others and wearing a face mask. Many stores are shut, and others have devised ways of serving the public by catering to them at the curb after orders have been called in. I could go on but the “public realm“ that we have customarily looked to as part of our life space has been dramatically restricted and transformed. Additional restrictions I am a coping with are a slow recovery from a broken shoulder and the subsequent operation, a “total reverse replacement” with large pieces of metal. So far this has restricted my mobility outside the limits of my property to those times that someone can accompany me. Thus, not only are there severe limits imposed by public authority on behavior in public spaces but also those imposed by my recent injury and operation. The results of these limits are to force uncharted behaviors and patterns of life. But, more importantly, they force changes in attitude, outlook, mood, and the capacity and desire to undertake normal as well as extraordinary projects, real and imagined.

It’s tempting and perhaps too easy to expand on the aspects of life space and life encounters that these restrictions affect:  not seeing friends in person, not being able to attend public events, concerts, let alone private gatherings;  changes in the information we receive, both its content and its intent. The situation we find ourselves in, sheltered down as we are, is one in which the outside realm has changed, becoming far less accessible to us as part of our life space. Also, this realm, created by the poisonous disease running rampant, has been partially filled by ignorant and biased individuals who have managed to acquire positions of power, some at the highest levels of our government, and who have room to continue their damaging rampages alongside the pandemic, largely unchecked; and they have found voice through the media. As a result one feels disempowered, less complete, more isolated. One senses a decline of democracy and democratic principles, and victimized by those in government and many organizations who seem intent upon further acquisition of power and wealth without the checks and balances that we have previously counted upon.

This entry was posted on April 23, 2020 at 5:27 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.